Your heart’s pumping and nerves catch flight. Your voice breaks into a million pieces and is screaming at you. The sounds of your own fury. You want to stop it but your heart begins to race and the faster you run after it the harder it beats. There’s no point in turning back now. You must keep going. You must keep reaching. The living don’t want it and the dead can’t seem to get enough of it. It’s life calling at your door step and the only person at home is you. At that moment, it’s hard not to want to curl up into a ball and cry. Life isn’t always your friend. Sure, it can seem nice and friendly but if you’re not firmly planted on the ground, it’ll get you. It can feel like you’re stuck in the wild with no where left to run or hide. You have to survive. There aren’t many choices and the ones available aren’t pleasing. “WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO ME?,” you scream. “Who else should it happen to, if not you,” responds life. “But why does it have to be so hard?,” you whimper. That’s life playing tricks with you again. You want to break free but you can’t seem to get out of that cycle. And when you do seem to shake it off, it comes back again unexpectedly. “SHIT!,” you think. “I thought I took care of that problem already?” History repeats itself and so do the events in your life. You still want to crawl into that hole. You want everything to stop. You don’t want to think about your problems. You just want them to be. You wonder if they will magically go away if you let everything go. So you decide to try it. You decide to let go for this one moment. For one minute to sit and be still and forget that that bad, mean, nasty, ugly, funky thing ever happened.
Let’s see how you feel after a minute of stillness. A minute of letting it all go. A minute of realizing that you don’t have to worry about anything. Though you may be surrounded by endless noise, in a crowded room full of people, you let it all go. Who are they to judge you anyway. Then that moment comes and you can see how silly you’ve been. It’s nice to think about the future, but if you think about it too much the pounding in your head just keeps going. The pounding in your head doesn’t stop. Life gets you!! And that’s not the way you want to live. YOU want to live LIFE. You don’t want it to walk all over you. For that one minute you were able to see things a little more clearly. Clear the fog away a little better. You’re hearts pumping a little less aggressively now and maybe the next time some big, mean, nasty, ugly, funky thing comes calling at your door you’ll recognize that it’s just a slice of life.
October is almost over. We’re deep in the heart of fall and as the winter starts the light outside begins to diminish. When we wake up in the morning it’s dark out. Most people spend the entire day in doors and when they leave work the sun has set again. Those evening and after work walks must be reserved for the weekends until it’s too cold to step outside at all. As the New Year approaches we may be wondering why such a joyous occasion is spent in the dead of winter or why people make resolutions when it seems best to just retreat. According to Pagan traditions, Winter is meant for reflection and personal growth while the Spring is for seeding new projects and ideas. As Spring begins it brings with it warm weather, new beginnings, and fauna blooming. There’s a natural push toward wanting to be outside as the environment changes, becomes lush and renews itself. As Fall approaches and it gets colder the trees become barren, nature and animals hibernate, we renew our gym memberships, eat warmer foods and stay indoors more often. If you usually feel stuck, tired or upset during this time of year it could be due to the change of season. And if you generally schlep through it or accept this as a way of being, perhaps this year you will change your tune!
Though the winter may seem dark, cold or repressive, many writers and artists will tell you that great work is often produced in silence. Rather than run away from the cold or hate the time you spend indoors or alone embrace it. Spend some time meditating, writing, reading, or just thinking. Just like animals hibernate in the winter, we also must learn how to hibernate our minds and refuel our bodies. It is when we are in deep thought, rest and relaxation that we have the energy and sustenance to produce great work. Challenge yourself this year and embrace the winter using your passions and talents to refuel. We often become so busy with life that we forget to take care of ourselves. The beauty is that we all have different passions and talents waiting to emerge. The secret to fueling your creativity is to take care of it. We spend time taking care of our bodies, why not our minds? Doing some thing creative is a great way to reflect during the cold season. If you’re not used to spending time alone, try it. Find your passion and use it to recharge. Use your creativity to create a space to hibernate in and reflect. Set aside a meditation corner filled with incense and crystals; Clear out some desk space to write your screenplay or novel; Build an artists studio to create new paintings; Or create an in home recording studio to make music. Set aside some time during the day and try to use your new space consistently. You might be surprised as the gates of inspiration come flooding in.