The doors opened and Genevieve walked out of her white castle. She let down her long dark braided hair, the waves cascading to her shoulders. She unzipped her light beige, draped, off-the-shoulder gown. It slipped to the ground as she walked forward leaving it on the grass behind her. The river, only a few feet away was crystalline. She walked towards it, and immersed herself in it’s glowing body. She swam a few feet and let the tide take her away. As she drifted naked down the shore her confidence drifted back to her. She lay on her back in the river with her arms outstretched floating down the bay. She passed the white houses, she passed the turtle doves, she passed the picket fences – also white. The purity of the land surrounded her. The surreal-ness of the land encompassed her. Her body was cleansed by the calm, clear water. She was renewed.
Genevieve opened her eyes. The night should have been a blur, but she remembered it all. The late night stumble into her apartment, the clumsy foreplay. Now, as she lay on her 100% Egyptian cotton bedspread, the large red wine stain seemed all too apparent. In the heat of last nights array, the spill meant nothing. She wasn’t fond of those sheets anyway. But in the presence of the sun’s light she regretted every decision made in the last 12 hours that lead to this morning’s shame. As she slowly arose now, the stain starred at her and she remembered the name of the man lying in her bed. Although she could still feel the warmth of his body by her, she felt cold inside. She unwrapped herself from their spooning and turned to face him. The challenge now was how fast she could get him out of her apartment. “We should do this again sometime,” he said smiling. “Yea, we should,” she responded. “Would you like some coffee?”
I was watching Amanda de Cadenet’s “The Conversation”, a new alternative interview show on Lifetime where the conversation taking place is about women. Amanda interviews influential females about their lives, struggles and how we can learn from their courageousness. A few weeks ago, Lady Gaga was on the show and discussed sexuality, dating older men and the importance of being true to your needs. She said, “I hope women out there watching see that if you’re lying in bed next to someone that really doesn’t make you feel like the goddess that you are, you need to re-discover what it is you truly want and need.”
As Gaga says, if the person lying, sitting or standing next to you doesn’t make you feel like a goddess, then you need to re-evaluate and really discover what it is you truly want. A cleansing and purification is in order. When we are in alignment and feel great about our lives, we do not cringe when looking at the person we are with. We care about any and every person who has come into our lives, and honor their presence. Sometimes it’s painfully difficult to admit the need to say no, to back away, to end a relationship or to tell someone to leave. But being in your own power, knowing what it is you truly want and need is about saying no to anything that isn’t serving you. Don’t offer them coffee, don’t pretend to like them, don’t say yes when you really mean no!
Part of being an adult and owning your own power is saying what you mean. If what you’re really intending to say is “I don’t want to spend any more time with you”, but instead the phrase, “Would you like some coffee?” magically emerges from your mouth – take some time off and get to know yourself better. Know what you want and go after it. Learn to speak your truth loudly and proudly because there is beauty in every true word spoken. And the rewards you’ll get for going after your true desires and treating yourself like a goddess will be massive.